China Rambling: 5 days and counting

I'm only going to be in China for 3 months but I will be experiencing the tail end of winter, spring and the beginning of summer so I really don't know where to begin packing. Not only that but March-May is rainy season in Shanghai and I don't even have rain boots. I guess it's time to come to terms with the fact that I'm going to have to do some shopping once I get there. This is scary to me for two reasons: 1. my Chinese is mediocre at best and 2. I don't know how to barter and I never will. I may need to resort to using taobao.com for everything if I don't figure out this bartering thing soon.

So I'm leaving in 4 days and none of this feels real to me yet. Like I've said before change fucking terrifies me and I'm scared of so many things. What if my roommate hates me? What if I don't make any friends? What if I get super homesick and have a nervous breakdown? What if I hate everyone? What if I get my organs harvested? Either way there's really no turning back now so I guess I'm just going to have to make the most of it once I get there. Everyone keeps asking me "Are you excited?" and ok, what kind of bullshit question is that? I'M MOVING TO A FOREIGN COUNTRY AND I CANNOT SPEAK THE LANGUAGE. Yes, I'm excited but mostly I'm having an anxiety attack.

THERE'S NO CHIPOTLE IN CHINA:10 Days and Counting

In approximately 10 days I will be living on the other side of the world for three months. Have I packed? Hell no. Am I ready to go? Hell yes. Don't get me wrong this 2.5 month winter break has been fun but I'm ready to study abroad. Mentally ready that is, I haven't even started packing or even come up with a packing list yet.

Today I thought of all the things I will miss having in China and since my blog is literally just lists why not add another list. 

In no particular order.

1. CHIPOTLE CHIPOTLE CHIPOTLE
2. Dr. Pepper
3. Clean air
4. My own bed
5. In 'N' Out Burger
6. Personal space
7. Louis (he's here as I write)
8. Grass
9. Seeing Mexican people
10. Seeing Indian people
11. English
12. My Fwiends <3
13. My Fambily<3
14. Free speech
15. The right to bear arms
16. Capitalism
17. Driving

Sleep, Work, Eat, Netflix, Repeat

So lately I've gotten into this routine of accomplishing nothing everyday. I'm not exaggerating. Just one month ago I made a "New Year's Resolutions" list, I'm failing miserably. The only part of the list I feel like I'm  actually accomplishing at the moment is whole "watch new movies" part. Yeah, I'm killing that resolution. I know I only have 3 months left before I go abroad but I feel like I should be doing something in that time. Like learning something or creating something. Yeah yeah yeah, I have a full-time job or whatever but it's not enough for me.

Here's my day...

7am: Wake up and get ready for work

8am: Arrive at work and start the day

12pm: Lunch

3pm: Contemplate suicide to get out of working 

5:30pm: FREE!!!

6pm: Netflix/Internet

7pm: Dinner

7:30pm Netflix/Internet

2am: Sleep

My life is actually so pointless right now.

Trouble is that I just don't know what to do and  there's like 6 million things I could be doing. 

Top 6 things I could be doing instead of what I am actually do now:

1. Learn some goddamn Chinese I'm going to be living in the country for like 3 months and I look Chinese but I can't read it or speak it very well. Excellent, they are going to hate me there.

2. Working Out haha no

3. Learning Photoshop this is a skill I would love to use to impress people/make myself look better in pictures

4. Read a book basically I am failing at this and it's also on that list of resolutions

5. Cleaning my room it's like an episode of Horders in here

6. Learn how to vlog how cool/embarrassing would it be to watch those kinds of things in the future?

Now I obviously can't do all of those things in the next 3 weeks but I could probably at least attempt like half of them. Tomorrow I will get off my ass and try to accomplish something after work! 

Sidebar for a second. YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO NOT TEXT BACK, ONLY I CAN DO THAT. NOW I HAVE TO PASSIVE AGGRESSIVELY PUNISH YOU.  Or you know...it's whatever, it's not like I care. Whatever. idk. bye.

I think I'll try cleaning my room tomorrow. That sounds doable. This whole entire blog post is just like a mess but I think I'm going to publish it anyway. In the off chance someone does read this...I'm sorry.

I'm sure other people do this too...

Ok when I'm alone at the grocery store or the mall or whatever I talk to myself in my head as if I am vlogging. I know some people will talk to themselves but I talk as if there is an audience that I am talking to. Other people to that too right?

It goes a little something like this.

Me: "Ok so I'm just gonna grab this cart. When did these carts get so huge? You know I read that when the cart is bigger you're incline to buy more. Hmmm what do I need to buy? Sometimes I feel like I just come to Target just to look at stuff. I'm so lame. Ok let's go over to makeup section because let's be honest I'm going to end up there eventually anyway."


I'm not crazy.